Men are just happier people / Humor

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BigPixel

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Men Are Just Happier People

What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Graying hair adds attraction. Wedding dress~$5000. Tux rental~$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks and shims.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
 
Joined
Nov 1, 2005
Messages
1,544
Location
Peoria, AZ
:tongue: How true it is!

We have a self cleaning house... Ask my husband, he will tell you!
 
Joined
Jul 30, 2006
Messages
11,569
Location
Southern California
I'd like to add: Going shopping only takes the time to locate the item in your size and find a check out line... or if you want, writing what you want on a list and leaving it on her pile :biggrin:
 
Joined
May 5, 2005
Messages
18,130
Location
Idaho
Yes, but I don't have to carry my photo equipment, change the oil in the car, rotate the tires, paint the high places, drive on long trips, wash the cars, work 60 hours a week, or clean up the dog poop.

I wouldn't change places with Greg for the world!
 
Joined
Nov 16, 2005
Messages
3,272
Location
Kentucky
Yes, but I don't have to carry my photo equipment, change the oil in the car, rotate the tires, paint the high places, drive on long trips, wash the cars, work 60 hours a week, or clean up the dog poop.

I wouldn't change places with Greg for the world!
Hmmm... I thought the plan was to buy the largest lens my wife could carry... did I miss something?
 
Joined
Feb 6, 2005
Messages
3,497
Location
South SF Bay Area, CA.
Yes, but I don't have to carry my photo equipment, change the oil in the car, rotate the tires, paint the high places, drive on long trips, wash the cars, work 60 hours a week, or clean up the dog poop.

I wouldn't change places with Greg for the world!
But, how about the garbage? Huh? That's the most important chore in the house, ain't it? Only a man can handle that! :rolleyes::smile:

Frankly, there is a bunch of stuff that just "happens" and I have no idea how... I am just grateful it does.
 

JPS

Joined
May 7, 2005
Messages
9,259
Location
North-East of Brazil
Not 100% true...

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.<br>
<br>
No wonder men are happier.
I know some women that also "have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache"... unfortunately, they usually choose (?) NOT to shave it :eek: !

(...please don't insist... i WON'T give names !)

Cheers mate,
J-P.
 
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