Men are just happier people / Humor

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by BigPixel, Apr 3, 2007.

  1. BigPixel

    BigPixel Guest

    Men Are Just Happier People

    What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

    The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Graying hair adds attraction. Wedding dress~$5000. Tux rental~$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks and shims.

    A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

    Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

    No wonder men are happier.
     
  2. Stef

    Stef

    Nov 1, 2005
    Peoria, AZ
    :tongue: How true it is!

    We have a self cleaning house... Ask my husband, he will tell you!
     
  3. ..and somehow the clothes are always neatly folded ! I must have a magic closet !
     
  4. ME TOO!!
     
  5. But yet, we NEED women---to make our lives complete :smile:
     
  6. So sad but they're all true!! :biggrin:
     
  7. Jarrell

    Jarrell

    Feb 13, 2005
    Macon, Ga.
    Personally, I can't find an exageration in any of them! :biggrin:
    Jarrell
     
  8. Man she has you brainwashed real gooood. We need to have a long long long chat...:eek: :biggrin:
     
  9. I'd like to add: Going shopping only takes the time to locate the item in your size and find a check out line... or if you want, writing what you want on a list and leaving it on her pile :biggrin:
     
  10. Phyer phyter "she has you brainwashed" ?????? SHE??

    I said " we need women" plural :biggrin: besides men don't do "long talks" :tongue:
     
  11. Yes,we are lucky aren't we.:biggrin:
     
  12. Terri French

    Terri French

    May 5, 2005
    Idaho
    Yes, but I don't have to carry my photo equipment, change the oil in the car, rotate the tires, paint the high places, drive on long trips, wash the cars, work 60 hours a week, or clean up the dog poop.

    I wouldn't change places with Greg for the world!
     
  13. Gale

    Gale

    978
    Jan 26, 2005
    Viera Fl
    Then why do I see so many angry men.
    Don't make no sence to me
     
  14. Cause we are expected to lift the lid. It really bugs us.
     
  15. gadgetguy11

    gadgetguy11

    Nov 16, 2005
    Kentucky
    Hmmm... I thought the plan was to buy the largest lens my wife could carry... did I miss something?
     
  16. There, now its correct! lol jk.
     
  17. It has been proven that a man will marry a woman hoping she doesnt change and a woman will marry a man thinking she will change him...
     
  18. But, how about the garbage? Huh? That's the most important chore in the house, ain't it? Only a man can handle that! :rolleyes::smile:

    Frankly, there is a bunch of stuff that just "happens" and I have no idea how... I am just grateful it does.
     
  19. :biggrin: So true!!! :biggrin:
     
  20. Not 100% true...

    I know some women that also "have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache"... unfortunately, they usually choose (?) NOT to shave it :eek: !

    (...please don't insist... i WON'T give names !)

    Cheers mate,
    J-P.
     
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